Change Over

So, I've spent 22 days away from guys in general.
Doesn't sound like much, huh?
Sad, but it is the fruit of telling myself "bet ya can't do it".
There are always nights I just don't want to be alone, and I had a system of keeping myself from having to be alone.
22 days, and today is 5 months after Danger's death.
It hasn't been as hard as I expected, but I'm happy it's a habit broken.
A friend of mine is trying to set me up with someone he works with. We'll see how/if it goes.
I've decided there are rules I'm putting in place for myself, some sound obvious, but haven't been to me thus far.
Like not being alone with a man who isn't my own.
It just leaves too much room for other people's questions, and for lonliness to take over. Too many risks. Those risks inevitably hurt afterwards. Going from lonely and alone to having someone to cover the gap without filling it and back to lonely and alone when they step outside the room is one of the most painful things I've been through.
I've also gotten very picky. I'm tired of feeling like I'm accepting someone into my life because they love me and not because I love them like I should and want to spend my life with them- or at least see if I can. I'm just tired of the same old thing. I'm tired of going in circles. There's got to be more than this.