One Year

I don't understand how Danger's been gone a year.
It seemed like, for months after his death, I would cry myself to sleep a few nights a week, begging him to take me with him or come back... I'd be lying if I said I'd completely accepted it or dealt with it in this last year. I understand it, I know it's real, but some days, it just doesn't seem like the world should still rotate on it's axis without him in it... He was such a fixture in my life, someone I absolutely adored from the moment I met him... While my ex-husband was in Iraq, when we were still married, Danger and I would spend nights at his tattoo shop, lying on that big red leather couch together, watching movies. Even when Veggie (ex hub) and I were doing very poorly, even when it would have been so much easier than holding back, Danger never let me slip, nor let himself slip, and nothing more than a hug and a very strong friendship passed between us.
It still blows my mind that a man like this could ever love me.
He was- is- will always be a rock star in my mind.
I still miss him so badly, I feel the tears when I allow myself to think about him much.
I love Mr Nice Guy, and I know Danger would approve.... but some days, I wonder if it was ever supposed to happen like this, or if this was the plan all along?
I miss you Danger, and I'll love you forever.