Love And Loss

This weekend didn't turn out quite the way I'd expected.
I didn't end up spending much time with Big Alamo who came to town this weekend- a battle buddy from basic training- or with Lady La La's crowd, like I usually do.
I met someone, at the club no less, who understands better than I can comprehend what I'm dealing with.

Talk about scary.

Bunny (short for Gun Bunny) is a tanker. Tankers are big guys, as a rule. He reminds me of my dear friend Tank on a level that is just plain eerie. He's going through his second divorce and has a grasp on it all that I wish I could say I could relate to. I've never had such a clear image, while going through something, of why it happened as it did. None the less, it's turmoil, and it sucks. If we end up dating, it wouldn't break my heart, but, for now, it's one day at a time. The patience this man has for my moods and emotions is mind-boggling. He's strong without being pushy, and laid-back without being passive. He's become a close friend very quickly, which is something that doesn't happen often. I allowed him alone with me in my car the first night we met. After 2 rapes in cars, that simply DOES NOT HAPPEN. I have people I consider friends that I'm not comfortable alone in a vehicle with. It's that serious.

He lives 5 minutes from me.
It's scary to lean on someone like this, and I pray that this isn't going to look like a re-run when all is said and done. Whether this turns into love or friendship or a memory, I have something to learn from this. I just pray it involves not repeating old mistakes/habits.

Painful is the path to healing, and terrifying is the path to faith.